Walk Yourself Thin
Diet vs. Exercise
By David Rives

So, you've finally decided to "blow off" those 20, 30, 50 extra pounds you've spent the last millennium "cultivating." Now the only question is:

How?

Well, obviously, in one of two ways: "Dieting" or "Exercise."

Which one?

Well, why don't we see where each one leads to and THEN make our choice:

DIETER'S LOG/DAY ONE

Well, decided to go one one of THESE again. Not sure why, since all they ever seem to do is leave me fatter, but don't see that I have any choice.

Besides, I think this one will be different: looks like it combines the very best from the Atkins Diet and the Stillman Diet and the Cambridge Diet and the Scarsdale Diet and the Pritikin Diet and the Mayo Clinic Diet and at least 42 other diets from the last 30 years, so this might be just the one I've been looking for!

I'll let you know.

DIETER'S LOG/DAY TWO

Well, got through the first day O. K.

Not sure how long I can hold out on steamed artichoke stems and black coffee five times a day, but I'm absolutely committed to making this one work, so please don't confuse me with all that mumbo-jumbo about "nutrition" and "vitamins" and "protein" and "scurvy" and stuff like that, because I don't want to hear it.

Besides, the guy who came up with this diet is obviously a lot smarter than I am, so who the heck am I to be questioning him?!

Anyway, gotta run: tomorrow starts the ground-peanut-shell phase of the program and I've gotta hit the feed store before they close.

Oh, almost forgot: lost 15 pounds yesterday, so my original analysis was right: this IS the Diet from Heaven, thank you very much messrs. Atkins, Stillman, Pritikin, Mayo and company!

DIETER'S LOG/DAY TWENTY-ONE

Not sure how much more of this I can take! Started the Atkins/Stillman phase of this thing a few days ago, and if I have to force one more 6-egg, bacon-and-cheese omelet down my throat, well...I wouldn't want to be "downwind" of me at that particular moment in time!

Also, had a terrible time of it with my shopping cart yesterday: damn thing kept wanting to stop in front of all the bad stuff -- apples and oranges and cherries and tomatoes and plums and peaches and the like -- when all I wanted it to do was fill itself up with good stuff: bacon and sausage and tri-tips and pork and...well, you know: DIET foods.

Remind me to give that cart the old what's-what tomorrow.

Oh: haven't lost a single pound since those first 15 "big ones." Not sure what I'm doing wrong here -- maybe not within the exact right bacon-and-sausage Zone. Probably just have to double up on each of them; should do the trick!

DIETER'S LOG/DAY 101

Well, as you know by now, Mr. Log, have thrown my latest Miracle Diet out with the bathwater.

Am truly sorry -- know it shows incredible weakness on my part -- but I just couldn't take it any more, especially the part about weighing every drop of food before I ate it (funny: now that I think of it, can't ever remember a SKINNY person weighing out all his food. And yet, he stays skinny, while all the food-weighers keep getting fatter and fatter. Wonder if someone's trying to tell me something there!)

Anyway, not sure where I'll be going from here, diet-wise, but do know one thing: that's the last "lunatic" diet I'll ever go on, believe you me!

Except:

There was this one I was reading about in the checkout line last night -- promised you could lose about 20 pounds a day on it and still be able to lift most of your smaller automobiles right over your head. Might just want to give that one a REAL good look. Had something to do with "sawdust souffles," if memory serves........

Mm-hm.

And now, from where the "other half" lives:

WALKER'S LOG/DAY ONE

Well, think I'll be giving this "walking thing" a try (Judy bought me this book....)

Not sure what good it'll do me, but nothing else has ever worked, long-haul, so what the heck...

WALKER'S LOG/DAY TWO

Walked to the mailbox and back yesterday; had to be a good 20 yards, there and back.

Talk about "sore!" Didn't realize how far "south" the old leg muscles had gone till I tried to use them!

Well, no matter: book says to at least give it a shot every day, so, soreness or no, out I go again.

Wish me luck with this stupid thing.

WALKER'S LOG/DAY TWENTY-ONE

Not sure what's going on here, but today I did THREE MILES! Kind of hard to believe, when I couldn't go "three feet" the first day, but there it is!

Haven't actually lost any WEIGHT yet, but, for some reason, my clothes all seem to fit a lot better, so that's something at least.

WALKER'S LOG/DAY 101

Couldn't wait to tell you, Mr. Log:

Finished my first 10-miler today!!

Didn't think I had it in me, but went out with Judy and, before you could say "Jack Robinson," there it was: 10 miles!

Hard to describe the feeling of accomplishment here, but, suffice it to say: I can't wait for tomorrow! (Funny: can't remember ever saying that on any DIET I ever went on!)

Still haven't lost all that much weight, of course, but who cares: am slipping into pants and shirts I thought I'd NEVER get into again, so who cares what I WEIGH: it's what I can WEAR that's important!

Oh, and one other thing: the more I walk -- the farther and the faster -- the less important FOOD becomes to me. Don't know why that is, but I'm sure happy it's happened.

So, adios calories and adios bodysize!

Wow, what a great feeling! And what a great LIFE!

And there you have it, good friends: "Dieting" versus "Exercise."

As they say: "Ball's in your court!"

David Rives is the author of the popular walking book, "Walk Yourself Thin."

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